Everyone is stressed nowadays, mothers especially. Today’s new mom puts a lot of pressure on herself. She wants it all: a thriving career, a strong relationship with the one she loves, a family with one or multiple kids. She wants to be available for the doctor’s appointments, the extra-curricular activities and the homework while still being reliable and highly-performing at work and attractive and interesting to her hubby. As a professional life coach and mother myself, what is overly apparent when gathered in a circle of new moms are mothers who are drowning; some have decided not to go down without a fight but some are quietly drowning within their own lives.
If you want a better life for yourself then you need to realize that change is within your control and that only you can get yourself into the life you desire. Here are 4 steps to take command of your life:
1. Know your values and live by them
Your values can be seen as the qualities of life that you cannot live without, for example, I value altruism and respect. As a parent, we lose our patience when we are not living within our values.
Once you know your most important values you can make better decisions. Your decisions should be preceded by this question: “Does it comply with my values or does it go against my values?”
To find out what your values are, ask yourself:
• Who do I want to be as a mother, wife, professional and person?
• What gets me most upset? When you get upset it is often because someone is violating one of your values.
2. Clarify your goals
Develop goals that will get you to live within your values, goals that will improve yourself in every aspect of your life: family, personal and professional.
Guidelines for developing goals and action steps:
• Make sure your goal is within your control to attain
• Make it specific
• Describe it with positive language. Instead of deciding not to “yell” at your kids, say: “I will use a calm voice to speak and discipline my children.”
• Have a deadline for each goal
3. Write down the action steps for achieving your goals
Write down all the steps you need to take to achieve your goal. Do this for each one of your goals. Each step should meet the 4 guidelines previously mentioned. Analyse each step and list all the possible obstacles that could stand in your way and then find solutions for each obstacle.
4. Ask for help
As a mom you are needed around the clock, especially with little ones, you are pulled in every direction: emotionally, physically and spiritually – you could use the help. There is no shame in asking for help. Think of it as a manifestation of your strength and commitment to your family.
You are responsible for your own life - so take the necessary steps to overcome your barriers and don’t strive for perfection but for better each day.
If you would like to work on getting to where you want to be, please contact me for a free introductory session at 450-458-4341.
Gaby Da Silva
Professional Life and Business Coach
www.gabydasilva.com
No comments:
Post a Comment